This... this is just a crime, right here. And it all just goes to support the RE:BD rule of "Have a paper source for any mythological creature submissions."
You see, the "tuba" is a Mongolian goat/snail hybrid, a very rare combination seen in folklore. The mollusk is rarely used as a specimen in legends and lore, and things rarely seep out of secluded places like Mongolia.
There's one catch, however: it's all a lie.
The entry can no longer be found on Wikipedia, the first place I learned of this "wonderful" beast, because it was discovered to be an elaborate hoax. The guy faked it all. Where it lived, the specific mountain ranges it inhabited, how it moved, what it ate, cryptoid possibilities, uses for its ground-up horns, cave drawings, ancient paintings from 13th century Mongolia, appearances in modern animations (Russian ones so no one would really know better), and more. This guy went all out.
Of course, once this disaster was learned, it was promptly removed from Wikipedia. There's a problem, however, in that not just WP had been diseased. The entire internet was forever changed by this hoax.
A lot of sites, like "Answers.com", are harvesters. They simply copy/paste information from places like Wiki-P. This is stupid, as (aside from it being stealing), when WP deletes something, the same may not be reflected at the other site, and more than one do this lame deed. Several sites now state the tuba as fact.
Why do I mention this? I was gonna make the Tuba as a B-Monster, maybe even as the next A-Monster. I had "discovered" it months ago, and was quite joyed with it. I even had some good pictures of it all fleshed out. I spent some of New Year's Eve even getting down the last details. It was awesome. Not only that, but in Key of Ages, the bland brown boy was to have his mystery familiar be this beast, a revelation I am glad I held back from.
The scary thing is, while this thing wasn't real, it is now. Much like how Kamaitachi were wind swords or the Chimaera had only one head, word-of-mouth trumps actual fact. With as fast as information evolves in the internet age, this sucker will be appear in video and role playing games alike in no time. Hell, it's already been thought up about giving it a permanent home in BD just like the Bestiary Snake.
The point of all of this is... well, not much of anything. This baby's on the half-tip. More of just pure horror and the sorts. I mean... gah! ... hoaxing! "Look at them. They make my eyeballs happy."
-Jerry "The King" Lawler on Mickie James
[Edited by MadGoblin on Jan 1, 2007 16:59]
Battalon127
Posts: 753
Member #25
Jan 1, 2007 21:05
This all goes to prove Stephen Colbert's concept of Wikiality. Something can be made true if enough people believe it to be true. Who knows what other untruths have been fed us? It's the start of 1984 I tells ya! Be afraid!! (Oh, and I would like to adopt this goat/snail. Really.)
LeeTupper
Posts: 158
Member #42
Jan 4, 2007 9:12
Well, what's policy on hoax animals, anyways? Will there ever be a hotheaded naked ice borer up for adoption?
Afiag
Posts: 252
Member #242
Jan 4, 2007 15:36
It has to have some basis in actual mythology, legend, or folklore.
You can't make something up.
If ignorance is bliss, then you must be orgasmic.
MadGoblin
Posts: 1515
Member #2
Jan 4, 2007 19:01
I believe his question was rooted in me saying the Tuba would earn a place in BD despite being a hoax monster. How knows what the policy is. I guess, if the monster is humorous enough (like the Camu, was it?) and not totally lame, it just might get a spot, too.
As for that ice borer... whiskey tango foxtrot?
"Look at them. They make my eyeballs happy."
-Jerry "The King" Lawler on Mickie James
Zedd
Posts: 286
Member #76
Jan 9, 2007 14:51
Well... Tuba sounds suspiciously like a large member of the brasswind family of musical instruments... And it doesn't have enough 'ks' and 'hs' for it to look like it's in mongolian...
But even so, a goat/snail would be kinda cool. If you had the right parts of the goat and the snail, anyway.
To sit on the fence is a dangerous call, but someone's gotta do it.
LeeTupper
Posts: 158
Member #42
Mar 4, 2008 17:03
This may be a belated response, but the hotheaded naked iceborer was a hoax creature from an issue of Discover Magazine, supposedly a rodent that used a searing hot plate of bone on its skull to tunnel through ice in the Antarctic. They were said to lead en masse attacks on penguins, dragging them under and shredding them to death. I mean, come on! Fire/Ice monster without the stupid gemini sort of thing people always try to do with fire/ice. But yeah, they're cryptid/hoaxes anyways, so no hope for them. Oh well. Mythology has enough awesome monsters that we don't need these modern inventions.
Oy vey. As somebody designing a card game based around Folklore/Urban Legends, I know how it is. You think: OMG! TOTAL AWESOME!
But then, you realize that it was just created by some total knucklehead who wants a break from their usual rickrolling agenda. It's gotten to the point where I only listen to Encyclopedia Mythica for online mythology sources, and I quadruple reference my non-print Urban Legends.
You have my sympathy, man.
BTW, when would the tuba ever actually come about as a B monster? I think that it'd be nice to pick up.
[Edited by LeeTupper on Mar 4, 2008 17:09]
MadGoblin
Posts: 1515
Member #2
Mar 4, 2008 18:49
Ah, yes, Encyclopedia Mythica: For when you want information that's true to fact and in one sentance
As for Tuba in the BD-verse, it'll come out when I get off my lazy keester, most likely. I'm hoping that comes with a break in the weather. Frigid temperatures = frozen hands = terrible drawing ability "So I said, 'You can't touch me there. You're my Uncle.' Ahhh, family."
- Marni Fliss, Committed
