... the Ghobling said "Peanut oil? That's lame!" he protested! "Why did this have to happen now? I don't have any of my peanut oil equipment around!"
"Well," the CMODdd noted, who's name actually, oddly, is actuall C'modd (shocking coincidence), "you have had twenty years to retrieve that stuff, or even built some from all the stuff laying around here!"
"Oh, I doubt that," doubted Gobbo... how redundant. "I see nothing of value around here," he said, glancing over the pile of disabled peanut oil related material pieces and parts next to the pile of working peanut oil utilizers. "I mean, duh!"
"So, you'd process the Computerized Automated Monkey Oodler? That's cruel!" he protested. "Have you no respected for the C.A.M.O?"
"Absolutely NOT!" he said, turning to the viewers with a cheesy smile and thumbs up. C'modd tapped him on the shoulder.
"Um, we're a story, not a show," he reminded the absent minded fool for the fifth time.
"Oh, right. That thing," he accepted. "Well, then, I'll just have to reverse time! ... Using magicks!" The sky clouded at his words and sent, streaking from the heavens, red lightning hurtling towards earth!
* CLUNK! *
"Ow," C'modd girlishly whined, rubbing his head. "I mean, DIDN'T HURT." The lunatic knave stooped down and picked up the object.
"Oo! Red Lightning(tm)!" Gobbo gasped. "Delicious generic brand soda at its best!" After quaffing the tasty beverage, he continued on with his original purpose. "Anyways, I shall use magick to time travel! ..." His eyes darted around in anticipation. "... what? Nothing this time?"
"Guess not," confirmed some random passerby on the street.
"Psst, Gobbo," the Marauder asked. "Who was that guy?" He could only shrug.
"Back to my original point, which, amazing," the fiend pointed out, "I did, in fact, have."
"SHOCK!" interjected C'modd.
"I shall use the mystical mystics of the mysterious mysteries in these mists- I mean, tomes that Lt. Eagle bestowed upon us," he explained.
"Oh, neat!" he squealed. "Er, sounds a'ight. So, you'll be doing some black magick- er, ... 'Warrior' magicks? 'Spiritual' magicks?"
"Pfft! No!" Gobbo rejected. "Those aren't fun. I'ma gonna use Summoning!"
"Summoning?" he puzzlingly inquired. "How can that change time?"
"Behold!" Lifing up his arms and channeling magickal power through his enchanted onion ring, a blackhole opened up from the ring's center. Out from the portal jumped... a larger onion ring!
"Bloody blood!" cursed C'modd. "What is that suppose to do?" The colassal ring made contact with the earth and began to roll, but not along the ground, the ground rolled along it! With massive force, the fried treat pushed the earth against it's rotation. Sun's rose from the west and set in the east as leaves flew into trees and were sucked into their branches. Monthes became years as years became... twenty years! Yeah, why not? Finally, the great, tasty hoop slowed till it came to a hault. Time had been reversed to the point were the C.A.M.O and the ... other guy whose name escapes me at the moment and I am too lazy to find out began their skirmish.
"How the hell did that happen?" demanded C'modd. "How did reversing the rotation of the earth reverse time itself? The earth has nothing to do with the control of time flow! There's a whole universe out there what was outside of its effects!"
"What? Haven't you ever seen Super-Man movie? Number... um... something?"
"I don't care what movie did it!" he snapped. "Besides, if time were reversed, wouldn't the onion ring have been flung back into its portal only to come out again to reverse time back unto the same point, causing a loop in the flow of time?"
"Well, that could be the case," Gobbo admitted, "but we'll never know now..."
"Why?"
"I... devoured it."
burp
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