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Board Writing :: Large Anchovy With Extra Cheese :: Page 1


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Posted by
MadGoblin
on
Jan 13, 2006


"What do you think you're doing, Chip?" Jethro scolded at the familiar face entering through the opened car door.


"Well, I thought you'd like some company while grabbing the pie," the skinny youth answered with too much waving of his hands.


"It's barely a drive," Jet dismissed. "I could walk there."


"Then why don't you?" countered Chip. The driver scratched his round stomach bulging out from his tee shirt stained with several days worth of food in deep meditation before shaking his head.


"You never volunteer to go anywhere," pointed out Jet, staring down his friend with squinty eyes.


"You never offer to drive anywhere." The two were deadlocked. "So, like, just so we're clear, we're going 'cuz Susie is working the counter?"


"You can come if you promise to stay in the car," Jethro ordered, viciously squinting at his passenger.


"Good enough for me. So, it's a large anchovy with extra cheese, right? Just like old times?" Jet nodded, licking his lips in anticipation. "Awesome. I can't wait to just kick back. This semester has been brutal!"


"It's the first week," grumbled the driver, starting the ignition.


"Yeah, and it's been brutal." Looking around, Chip spotted the parking permit hanging on the rear view mirror, next to the turtle plushie. "Dude, that thing says to remove it before the car's in motion."


"Oh, c'mon," groaned Jethro. "What's gonna happen? The car will catch on fire?" Shifting to reverse, the moment his sneaker left the break, an infernal laughter filled the cab.


"Fools! You have disobeyed the seal's instructions!" cried out a mysterious voice. "Now, after a long slumber, I, Parkpassor, shall roam the Earth to deal out evil once more!" With a fiery blast, the permit revealed its true form and fled from the vehicle.


"What the hell was that?" demanded Jethro, confused as he was starving.


"It was an ancient evil," a wisened, second voice called out, coming from the glove compartment. The storage unit's door opened to unveil a shriveled little person in robes and a coned hat. "Now, it is your duty to stop that evil and seal it once again!"


"Me?" blurted the man in utter disbelief for the fairy's words or any of the recent events. "But, why me?"


"Because, young Jethro," the small spirit told, changing to a dire tone, "I just retired." Removing his coned hat, he tossed it at the large man. With a good luck salute, the strange being crashed through the side window and rolled along the ground before scampering away. "Have fun with that," his words faded into the distance.


"Well, I guess that's what the guy who sold me his car meant with 'something extra in the glove box'..." Scrunching the tiny hat within his hands, Jet looked up at all the destruction Parkpassor had already caused. "Well, this really doesn't look good. Huh, Chip?" With no response, he looked over to see his passenger a charred skeleton. "Oh, man! He killed my best friend... who owed me five bucks." Reaching into the corpses pants, he retrieved the borrowed cash. "'Kay, we're squared." With the thought of driving away from all this and never coming back, Jethro looked to see his plush reptile absent. "That bastard took Mr. Speedy!" Bursting out of his car, he screamed in a burning rage and swore vengeance against Parkpassor. Speaking of burning, the smell of smoke caught his attention. "It caught fire?" he stated with his arms still raised, finding that his car had been ablaze and slowly consumed. "Well, I'll be..."




Posted by
boyachi
on
Feb 12, 2006


With one hand in his pocket, and the other one still holding the tiny hat, Jethro walked the lonely road, on the boulevard of shame. "Now let's see: As well as getting a pizza, I have to get back Mr Speedy, stop some evil paper and file an insurance claim for the car...and probably avenge my friend in the process, which I think is unfair because he wasn't going to pay for his share in the first place, but..." Removing his thumb from his belly button, Jet checked his inventory. "Let's see, I've got chip's five bucks, this loony hat, and my wallet with just enough for pizza money. I only have one course of action, I'm getting the pizza first. Man I can smell it from here..." the husky man moaned as he opened the door to the pizzeria.

"Hi, welcome to Perky Pete's Plethora of Perfect Pizza's." mechanically spoke a bored woman working the counter.

"Hey, Hey! Sandie!" Jet sucked in his gut "S'pose you could hook me up with my favorite, Aside from you of course?" He cracked a smile and pointed to her as she rolled her eyes.

"Sorry Jethro-"

"You can call me Jet."

"Jet," as she lifted up her arm and coughed "loser" into it "That guy over there ordered a party sized anchovy with extra cheese, so we're like, out of salty fish."

"Parkpassor is immune to indigestion!"

"You!" Jethro stopped throwing his irresistable charm at Sandie and stormed to the table where the evil parchment being sat. "You did that on purpose!"

"I fear NO man, foolish boy!"

"Oh, just you wait 'til I get my hands on you, ya-"

"MANAGER!"

From the back, a small man strode up to the two mortal, well, mortal and immortal foes. "What seems to be the problem, sirs?"

"This man is harassing me!" the evil incarnate leaned forward, eyes ablaze.

The manager turned to Jet. "Have you ordered anything, sir?"

Jethro blinked "We'll no, cuz-"

"Sir, you are disturbing our customers, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"But-"

Sandie called from the counter "Order ready for a Mr Parkpassor."

With a cackling roar, the demon shot into the sky, instantly burning the entire into ash, which softly fell onto its inhabitants "I HAD NO INTENTION OF EATING IT!"

Jethro stomped his foot in a pile of carbon as he donned the tiny hat. "Curse you parkpassor! I'll get you! You JERK!"

Sandie walked over to the manager. "Um, the resturant is like destroyed and the customers have totally lost it, can I leave my shift early?






**** This story is still being written. You, too, can contribute to it by writing the next installment. ****


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